Total fucking bullshit is the lifeblood of civilization
alec’s “spells” come from his stories. instead of choosing specific spells to memorize, he can extemporaneously cast any wizard spell of an appropriate level by explaining to the group why it’s perfectly reasonable that the magical effect is occurring.
have you ever really listened to the birds, kid? i learned this while hiking in the forests of raz’ell, outside the gibbenswood. i mean, of course they don’t speak our language. but if you listen carefully, and ignore the ‘words’ themselves, you can start to hear the underlying intent in their voices…
you hear it on the streets. you hear it in the market stalls, along the merchants’ rows, down the broad boulevards and through the back alleys, up and down the docks and jetties of the waterfront, and on every floor of every building in the city. it’s the force that propels each individual moment, and it’s the only whisper of the past or future that we have.
total fucking bullshit is the lifeblood of civilization. alec ought to know. he’s a genius with total fucking bullshit. when he was a young lad, at the orphanage, he and another boy stole some food out of the larder. the master brought them in front of all of the kids, and asked them to confess. the other boy did. alec did not. the other boy was locked up without food or water. alec walked.
now, did alec just say “no?” or did he tell a different sort of story? did he talk about how he saw who did it, and where they hid the rest of the food? did he tell a story about what he was doing instead, dropping subtle hints about knowing the master’s secrets? did he tell the one about how the other kid threatened or duped him?
fuck, to be honest, alec doesn’t really remember. he just remembers that that was the first day that he realized that total fucking bullshit is magic, and if you use just the right words, you can be the magician.
and it’s true – as much as anything is. few people know it, but it’s true all the same – that sometimes, when he’s really hitting on his best material, alec can say some total fucking bullshit, and abracadabra! there it is – as real as if it had always been true.
that’s the best total fucking bullshit in the world. the kind that the whole world – even alec himself – forgets isn’t true.